Tag Archive | spirituality

A Turbulent Heart

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God’s Thoughts to Me

My soul followeth hard after Thee; Thy right Hand upholdeth me (Psalm 63:8 KJV).

She has heard about Jesus, so she came up behind Him through the crowd and touched His robe (Mark 5:27, NLT).

Behind The Veil

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The late Brennan Manning said in his book, The Lion And The Lamb,” You will trust God only as much as you love Him. You will love Him not because you have studied Him. You will love Him only because you have touched Him – in response to His touch”.

Divine wisdom wrapped in Truth. Jesus warned the Pharisees that they were searching the Scriptures daily thinking that in them they had eternal Life.

But they were oblivious to the Living Word, blind to the Eternal Life standing right in front of them and they were doomed.

I recall a time in my own life when I was stumbling through a severe winter season. My physiology and psychology were naked and lost in sinister, dark, lifeless forest of religiosity.

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The giant branches of the ancient trees of traditions gnarled its fingers around my turbulent heart, trying to steal the last shreds which were panting for streams of the Living Quiet Waters of freedom.

They locked me up with the chains of religious high-sounding words in the cruel grip of laws and rules and regulations at a time when my body was immobilized by pain and exhaustion.

But like the Pharisees, my spirit was the prisoner of the lifeless idol of Bibliolatry. Silent pitiful cries and despondent tears enveloped me with an unbearable longing to touch the Robe of the Beloved.

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For many years I was an avid student of Theology and had the fundamentals of the faith at my fingertips. I could almost quote the Bible, chapter and verse.

I fell in love with the idea of God’s grace and love, but this love affair was only a figment of my imagination.

It was a poor substitute for that almost magical reality of a spirit becoming one in union with the sweet Spirit of God; that intimate closeness that seemed so utterly unobtainable.

It was not for lack of trying; just the opposite. I was the master striver, striving earnestly to build beautifully crafted altars, begging God to consume my hand crafted offers with the fire of His Love.

I was from the old school who prided themselves in their strong work ethic and was perplexed by the absence of Holy Fire.

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No … it was because of my lack of touching Him as a response to His touch. My heart was bound with the cords of doctrines and creeds. I was experiencing the death of the letter of the law.

My lips were singing Hallelujahs, but my heart was far from my first Love, yearning for that mysterious something many saints seemed to smile so secretly about all through the ages.

At the same time, I was suffocated by an unhealthy fear of God. I was terrified of that relentless monster of self-condemnation and shame.

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This master of deceit taunted me day and night with sneering, damnable lies that my hand was already spoken for by the dark, evil one.

When I stumbled upon these words of Mr Manning, a new day dawned in my inmost heart. A passionate, burning flame pierced my soul and my eyes were opened to see beyond the veil of my mind.

I was swept off my feet, overwhelmed with a love that was at the same time beautifully disturbing and devastatingly delightful. I was in awe of the prevenient grace of our King.

imageThoughts of another woman from another time; the woman with the issue of blood stirred my mind. We were both at a very lonely and needy place; both at the crossroads of our lives; bankrupt and seeking the ancient paths of eternity.

With shame I confess that I hoped that our Pappa would to transform Himself into a genie in a bottle, where my wishes were His commands.

But this Genie surely seemed as deaf as a doorknob and as blind as a bat, very unappreciative of all my clever selfish maneuvers. Yet, He patiently and gently kept on drawing me into His Loving Embrace.

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When I finally came to the end of my tether, I had no other choice but to crawl on my spiritual knees, like the woman with the issue of blood, until my heart finally touched the hem of my Beloved’s heart.

He took the tatters of my brokenness and started to heal me from the inside out. Although my illness is still very much part of my life, He has brought me to a place of sweet acceptance.

A place where I can eagerly look forward to the day when I will leave this old coat behind to be clothed in a new glorious spiritual body.

I will not dare to trivialize the suffering of a chronic illness, but I do want to dare all to follow hard after our God, assured of His right hand upholding us.

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Crawl if necessary until you are near enough to touch our Lord Jesus again and again and again … and then still again and again.

Much love and sweet blessings xx

Mia

I am linking-up with the ladies at my Tea Time and Link-Up page.

Writing Stories

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God’s Thoughts to Me

See, I have written your name on the palms of my Hands (Isaiah 49:16, NLT).

He will take delight in you with gladness. With His love He will calm your fears. He will rejoice over you with joyful songs (Zephaniah 3:17b, NLT).

Love Letters In Sandy Soil

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Long, long ago, before the birth of time, You were the Author of Creation when the intensity of Your Love exploded into the story of man.

Breathless with desire, you created a crown for your glory … the ones to enjoy your love forever … the ones who refused the fruit of your Passion.

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Yet, still, you write love stories at the break of each day with the rays of sunlight to woo your lost ones home. You splash your words with the colorful mercies in the promises of rainbows.

You caress us with beautiful birdsong and the fragrance of your compassion is captured in the petals of delicate flowers.

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You heal the bended reeds with the fresh early morning dew drops of your grace.

Every faintly flickering firefly shines brightly with new life and the glory of your gladness after you have touched them with the brilliance of your smile.

You are the Author of a the love letter once written in the quicksand of the world when I was naked and soiled in the eyes of the monster called Self-Righteousness.

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You bent down to where I was lying in the dirty soil of despair, petrified and shivering with fear as rocks and stones of cruel words were killing me slowly.

Your gentle heart touched my fragility and filth and transformed my sin soiled rags into the beautiful gown of Your Righteousness. You crowned me with the crown of your glory.

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You gathered me into your Embrace and wrote a new song in the dusty soil of my brokenness … a special song where I am yours … the most beautiful of all … a song where you are my Beloved.

Much love and sweet blessings xx

Mia

Linking -up with Lisa-Jo and the ladies at my Tea Time and Link-Up page

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Take Me

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God’s Thoughts to Me

It was for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery (Galatians 5:1, NIV).

A Shadow Child

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She was a child of the summer

a colorful sunbeam

I was a shadow child

a sorrowful sigh

She was surrounded by angel song

I was drowning in evil tears

One day I woke up,

and found her

beside my bed

inside my heart

Softly I whispered

calling her, drawing near

“Come, take me”

You are the melody of Love

I am the darkness of the moon

You whisper exquisite tunes of joy

I catch them and write a song

Much love and sweet blessings xx

Mia

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Linking with Lisa-Jo and the ladies at my Tea Time and Link-up page.

Courtroom of Heaven

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God’ Thoughts to Me

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of The Lord forever (Psalm 23:6, KJV).

Shirley, Mercy and Grace

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Heaven’s Courtroom was abuzz with breathless expectation! The three angels, Shirley, Mercy and Grace, were summoned by His Majesty, King Jesus.

According to the heralding angel who trumpeted the summons through the universe, King Jesus countenance was enveloped by the most beautiful rainbow of love and compassion.

Tripling with excitement the Triplet bowed down to their Heavenly Host in reverence, filled with brilliant delight to be in His Presence. The King was beaming with a glint in His eye when He informed them of His wishes.

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“I have chosen you to be My servants to a little baby girl who will be born nine months from today. She will be My gift of joy to her mother for I have heard the cry of her heart!

She will be called Mia for she will forever be Mine and I am lending her to her mother for only three years. Then her mother will return home to us.

Even amidst the darkest nights of her little soul, she will trust in Me. Gather as much star dust as necessary to baptize her as Mine the moment she is born.

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Shirley, wherever her little feet will tread during her sojourn on earth, your duty will be to make sure that she stays forever in the Shelter of My Wings.

You know from dear experience that these precious ones of Mine can be very stubborn, seeking their own way while listening to the deceiver’s lies!

Mercy, you need to make sure that My little darling will know that My mercy, love and goodness towards her are from everlasting to everlasting.

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But, I tell you in advance that she will suffer much and you need to be patiently persistent for at the right time, I will enable her to hear My voice.

Grace, you need to assist Me in cultivating a garden in her heart. You daily need to plant seeds of grace and enlighten the narrow path of Grace for her to find her way out of the dark, lost world.

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Some of these seeds will grow into mighty cedars of Lebanon. But some will grow by My design into a luscious orchard where she and I will feast together on the fruit of her love for Me.”

Much love and sweet blessings XX

Mia

Linking-up with Lisa-Jo and all the friendly hostesses at my Tea Time and Link-Up page.

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Daily News

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God’s Thoughts to Me

The kings of the earth prepare for battle; the rulers plot together against the Lord and against His Anointed One. “Let us break their chains,” they cry, “and free ourselves from slavery to God. But the One who rules in heaven laughs. The Lord scoff at them. (Psalm 2:2-4, NLT).

Small Minds

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The world is a publishing house blessed with new mercies and empty sheets at the break of each dawn.

It yearns for small stories of love and beauty written with rays of sunlight and colored with rainbows flickering through frisky dew drops dancing on blades of grass.

imageBut the Tabloids of Life are written with the blood of murders and wars … the pain and sorrow of corruption … the putridness of crime … the infidelity of humanity.

The world’s Gazette is manipulated by a social hierarchy playing a game of chess with the minds of man. A Trinity of Terror splashes the front pages with lies and deception:

Politicians, puffed up with vanity, are leading their puppets, firmly gripping their strings of straw, into a pseudo peace beyond the grasp of any human mind. They are messing in the business of God.

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Economists are promising an emaciated, starving world with beguiling lies, food and drink to feed and fill every empty belly groaning with hunger and thirst, seeking silently for breadcrumbs from the tables of the rich. They are playing God.

Religionists are building beautiful staircases to heaven, leading straight to hell, with tithes stolen from the overburdened naive, without lifting a finger to ease the sorrow of a suffering world. They think they are gods.

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Yet, in the “Small’s” section of every newspaper, our little lives are interviewed daily. We are small advertisements, twinkling with the glory of grace … shining with the beauty of forgiveness … telling the wondrous story of love.

Much love and sweet blessings XX

Mia

Linking-up with Lisa Jo. Please visit my other linky places at my Tea Time and Link-Ups page.

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The Sinai Encounter

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God’s Thoughts to Me

Either you will find yourself opening up more and more to the Lord – and you will know it – or else you will find yourself constricting and tightening, in which case the atmosphere will become intolerable (Terry Fullam, Miracle in Darien).

Parable of A Father’s Love

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In 1979 Terry Fullam, an Episcopalian priest, was trekking in the footsteps of the Israelites during their exodus from Egypt.

At Mount Sinai he had an encounter with God and was directed to the St. Paul’s Episcopal Church in Darien, Connecticut. They needed a minister and had called Mr Fullam a few weeks prior to the Sinai encounter.

The day he preached his debut sermon, the congregants were looking at him with great expectancy when he delivered  the words above.

Yet, they were stunned into silence when he remarked that some of them might even find it necessary to leave the congregation.

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For three successive Sundays he preached about nothing else but the great, scandalous love of our Pappa for each one of His children individually.

When the elders tentatively enquired when he was going to start preaching about something else, he replied that only when all of them really and truly believed this vital truth.

I had the honor of reading the book, The Miracle in Darien, a few years ago and was impressed by how our Pappa whispered His life into the heart of a congregation that was not much more than a heap of dead, dry bones.

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I  was also deeply convicted of my unbelief and knew that I did not really have the saving kind of faith … the kind that knew my Pappa’s love … the twinkle-in-the-eye-song-in-the-heart kind of childlike faith.

Valiantly and with an unhealthy dose of fear and trembling, I tried my utmost to get my head faith to somehow find the road less traveled to my heart for I had often heard sermons on our need to do this!. Oh, I failed miserably and completely!

Eventually I realized that only as I admit my total lack of not only not understanding faith and grace, but also my inability to supernaturally conjure up some magical fairy faith, could Pappa bless me with abundant faith and mercy!

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Unbeknownst to me, I was actually at a very good place for I had to admit my failure to my Pappa. I told Him that if He doesn’t give me faith as a free gift of His grace, I will forever be a heathen.

I reminded Him that even Jesus told us that with us nothing is possible, even the simple act of believing. This He did with gladness.

The angels were rejoicing in heaven over this stubborn child who at least had the common sense to go home when she was at her wit’s end. He led me to another little book, He Loves Me, by Wayne Jacobsen.

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Through this book, our Pappa opened my eyes to another central focus of the parable of the Prodigal Son: the love of the Father.

This Father acted shockingly when His good-for-nothing son claimed his inheritance while his Father was still alive; He gave it to him. Have you ever heard of such audacity!

To add injury to insult the son squandered all his riches on wine, women and song while his Pappa was waiting with longing on the farm.

When he ended up destitute, his Pappa didn’t rush to rescue His child, neither did He nag or prodded his son to get his life in order.

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No, He allowed him to hit rock bottom, hoping that he would remember his Pappa’s unconditional love and come home willingly. When he was still a far way off, His Father, who was waiting with longing since the day he had left, saw him.

He hiked up His robes and ran down the road to meet His wayward son whose famished stomach made him prepare a good repentance speech.

The Father didn’t hear a word of His child’s apology, but smothered him with hugs and kisses of delight. There was not even a hint of anger or retribution.

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No, instead of receiving punishment, this child received a feast fit for a prince to celebrate his homecoming. He told His servants to dress His child in royal robes and to put His signet ring on his finger.

Our Pappa showed me how He is totally the opposite of an earthly parent. Here on earth we make such a big issue of obedience and respect.

But this is not what my Pappa wanted. He desires nothing else but my whole heart, my love and my life from the moment He formed me in the seclusion of my mother’s womb.

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He is not interested in our sacrifice and service to Him and reminds us that He is not served with human hands (Acts 17:25). No, not at all!

He wants each and every one of us to truly know how much He loves us. He desires an intimate relationship with all His children, as if that one was His one and only, hoping that we would willingly love Him in return.

Oh, what joy when the Heavenly Light of Love flooded my heart with the sunshine of understanding.

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He took my hand and invited me to stand on His big Father feet while He taught me how to dance to the rhythm of the heartbeat of His love.

Much love and sweet blessings.

Mia

Linking-up with

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A Fairy Dance

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God’s Thoughts to Me

To all who mourn in Zion, He will give a crown of beauty for ashes (Isaiah 61:3, NLT).

Soap Bubble Imagination

The beauty of imagination transforms soap bubbles into fairies clothed in exquisite flimsy gowns of flower leaves.

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They dance minuets and waltzes with valiant dwarves on the sweet melody of the moonlight serenade.

Crickets play the violins and bullfrogs sing the bass.Their music tells the story of the Divine Presence while fireflies transform the forest dance floor into a glorious rainbow and nature rejoices in light.

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Then …

Darkness descends with deceptive lies masquerading as an Angel of Light. It hisses its venomous lies, daring them to imagine they can be masters of their own fate.

It spews venomous fire that causes a forest fire inferno destroying all the life and the fragile beauty of imagination until only ashes remain.

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But the Prince of Heaven scoops the ashes into His hands, blowing it softly onto the wings of His Spirit Wind who carries crowns of beauty to His Majesty’s Throne of Grace.

Much love and sweet blessings

Mia

Linking-up with

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